Tend & Befriend: ADHD Support Group as Self-Care for Moms #241
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When you go to a party, no matter the occasion or fanciness level, people often gravitate towards the kitchen.
They circle up near the host at the grill or around the kitchen island, chatting while leaning against the counter and snacking on crackers. Even when they could be sitting in a comfy chair, people gravitate towards the heartbeat of the party. The kitchen.
This is how I want my community to feel… casually hanging around the kitchen counter, with snacks and drinks. Come and go as you please. Showing up as yourself, in whatever you’re wearing that day. No pressure.
I want you to feel like someone is taking care of you. Guiding you. Feeding you snacks and cleaning them up. Giving you a big hug when you walk in and out the door.
(Because honestly, I’m pretty peeved you’re not getting the care you deserve.)
Having YOUR people in your corner is more than a nicety. It gives you sturdiness and stability. It’s self-care for tired moms.
You’re invited to hangout around my kitchen island, figuratively speaking.
Join us in creating a space where you can be you, laugh, talk, and even let out a mom sigh or two, because we've all been there. Plus, you'll get to enjoy activities like body doubling and small group discussions where you can find the peas for your pod. You don’t have to juggle everything, including the mental load, on your own.
It’s been so good for the moms (and me, too!) and I want you to come too!
Our Successful Mama Meetup community meets every Wednesday on Zoom. Come hang out!
Join our next Open House by signing up here and I’ll email you the invite. It’s totally free to try out.
So, grab your earbuds and tune in to find out how we're making Successful Mama Meetups the support system you didn't know you needed—but definitely deserve.
After all, who runs the world? Moms!
Want to try out Successful Mama Meetups today?
Use the coupon code EPISODE241 for a 50% discount on your first month’s membership. Sign up here: patriciasung.com/meetup
Patricia Sung [00:00:00]:
Public service announcement. Why do we as moms have to be in the ER before we realize, crap, I have to take care of myself so that I can take care of my kids? Why? Are you overwhelmed by motherhood and barely keeping your head above water? Are you confused and frustrated by how all the other moms make it look so easy? You can't figure out how to manage the chaos in your mind, your home, or your family. I get you, mama. Parenting with ADHD is hard. Here is your permission slip to let go of the Pinterest worthy visions of organization and structure fit for everyone else. Let's do life like our brains do life, creatively, lovingly, and with all our might. When we embrace who we are and how our brains work, we can figure out how to live our lives successfully, and in turn, lead our families well. At the end of the day, we just wanna be good moms.
Patricia Sung [00:01:01]:
But, spoiler alert, you are already a great mom. ADHD does not mean you're doomed to be a hot mess mama. You can rewrite your story from shame spiral to success story, and I'll be right here beside you to cheer you on. Welcome to Motherhood in ADHD. Before we jump into this week's episode, let's read our review of the week. This review is from Otesha!, and I'm saying Otesha! because it has an exclamation point at the end, which is my kind of girl. Otesha! says, a safe place at your pace with success with ADHD. Five stars.
Patricia Sung [00:01:41]:
This podcast has provided me with more acceptance and appreciation for my ADHD diagnosis as I've gotten better with strategies to management of my ADHD and anxiety as a black woman and mother who adores being an out of the ordinary parent. Otesha!, I am so glad that you were accepting yourself to the level where you adore who you are. That's a win in my book. If you have not yet rated the podcast, please go over, hit 5 stars, and tell me why so that I know that you are here listening. Hey there, successful mama. Listen. We need to talk.
Patricia Sung [00:02:17]:
I notice that no one is taking care of you, and I am sick of no one taking care of you. And to be totally honest, you included. A couple weeks ago, I got a message from mom. We're doing a coffee chat. She's asking about coaching. She was very hesitant about committing, and she gives me three reasons why. She's, like, at the ER and got a migraine and some other health things going on, and maybe she should fix the health stuff before doing coaching, but also her life is a mess. Her husband's pissed.
Patricia Sung [00:02:45]:
Her marriage is falling apart. Now she's looking at her kids being like, I don't want you to grow up and be like me, but I'm in the ER, and I can't even take care of you because I'm not healthy enough. And I'm like, public service announcement. Why do we as moms have to be in the ER before we realize crap. I have to take care of myself so that I can take care of my kids. Why? Here's the thing. I can call you out on this because this was me 5 years ago. This is me, Patricia.
Patricia Sung [00:03:16]:
Very similar situation. Like, I get all that. I have been very sick and almost dead. And I get what that's like to be so sick that you can't do anything else because you're just trying to stay alive. But like, why do we have to get to that point? Before we like reach out and like, I would like some help, but like not right now. I gotta stay alive first, but I need some help. Why do we wait to that point? It is not okay that you are not taking care of yourself and nobody else is so that you don't get to that point. Because I get some variation of this message literally every week.
Patricia Sung [00:03:47]:
I really wanna help, but my life's falling apart. I don't know if I can do both. This is. You deserve basic care. Yes. I know you got 37 things going on. You got 82 problems and this and that and all the things. And there's always another reason that moves higher on the list, and you move yourself down the list until your body revolts, until you get sick, until your partner walks out.
Patricia Sung [00:04:10]:
Whatever disaster strikes, and all of a sudden, you're there left picking up all the pieces, you, you picking up the pieces of whatever fell apart, you need care too. You need basic necessities in order to function. It's really hard to live in chaos 247, and you don't have to. Like, granted, we don't have to fix it all right now. But, like, one of the things this mom was freaking out about is that she thinks she has to solve some things in order to work on the other things. And, like, that's not how life works. Things are always messy. Yes.
Patricia Sung [00:04:42]:
I understand there's sometimes things are on fire. We gotta deal with the fire first. But, like, life never gets boring. There's never nothing to do. When does a mom be like, look around and be like, wow, I have nothing to do. It literally never happens. There is always more laundry. There's always more self care things you could be doing.
Patricia Sung [00:05:01]:
There's always more dust landing on your shelves. Most of motherhood is never done. I think that's why being a mom is, like, one of the hardest jobs because there's no start and end to projects. There's no start of laundry and end of laundry. The laundry never ends. The parenting, it goes on forever. Even when they're 80 and you're a 102, it never ends. Motherhood is never done.
Patricia Sung [00:05:21]:
So we can't pause taking care of ourselves to wait until motherhood has checked off enough boxes so that you have capacity to take care of yourself because it's never gonna happen. This is why I have my community because every week we start again, and every week we need to know what's going on to feel prepared, to be ready, But we're in charge of the day. The goal of successful mama meetups is not to solve all your life problems at once. The goals like day to day thriving. How do we make today better? How do we make tomorrow better? How can we make things better little by little, day by day, the baby steps, Like, we get disappointed when we think tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day that I'm gonna wake up and be somebody different. I'm gonna do 5 AM yoga. I'm gonna watch the sunrise and do my quiet time.
Patricia Sung [00:06:08]:
I'm gonna drink a green smoothie and follow my budget and go to bed early. No. No. You won't. You're not gonna. You're still gonna wake up because your toddler is bobbing on your head asking you to wake up because they're hungry. You're still gonna eat leftover PB and J crust for lunch, and you're still gonna order takeout because you forgot to frost dinner. And you're still gonna scroll IG until 11 PM because that is your habit.
Patricia Sung [00:06:32]:
Sorry to be Debbie Downer for a second here. You cannot change everything at once, but you can change something small. You can look at your calendar for tomorrow and see, oh, look. I don't have time for gourmet cooking, but I do have time to chop up some fruit for a smoothie. Or I can pack the field trip lunch so you don't have to do it tomorrow morning. You can change doing something like you don't have to be consistent. You don't have to do it every day. It could just be like more often than not.
Patricia Sung [00:06:57]:
More often than not, I am changing this instead of expecting perfection. You can make today a little easier by having a plan for your day. You can make tomorrow a little easier, a little more like thriving instead of surviving because you're not overwhelmed trying to be a new human tomorrow. This is why I have successful MamaMears because I saw how looking at my calendar and preparing for my day and my week made huge changes by doing it little by little. I saw how I was able to move from being reactive to proactive with practice and patience and instilling new ways of doing things one at a time because I was the chief of the I will be a new person tomorrow club. Tomorrow's the day that I go to bed early. Tomorrow's the day I don't yell at anybody. Tomorrow's the day where I'm somebody else doing something different by magic because I don't plan.
Patricia Sung [00:07:49]:
That used to be me. I still do it sometimes. I will be honest. And then I usually realize, oh, Patricia, are you trying to be somebody else tomorrow? Okay. Well, let's bring it in. What's one thing we can do about that? I created this group of moms because I want you to feel like you were hanging out at my kitchen counter. No matter, like, what kind of get together casual, fancy party doesn't matter. 9 times out of 10, everyone ends up in the kitchen standing around the counter.
Patricia Sung [00:08:11]:
When I think back to my childhood, like older childhood, like when I was a teenager, whenever I would come home, there would be, like, half a dozen 9 or 10 year olds of my, like, my brother's friends on the couch. Like, my mom always had snacks out for the neighborhood kids, or it would be my sister and her best friend, you know, with their, like, dyed black hair and too much eyeliner sitting at the kitchen table, or I think back to, like, when I was in high school, my best friends would pick me up and take me to school in the morning, and they'd be sitting on the counter while my mom made breakfast, and they would drive me to school because I was always late and, like, literally, like, ran out the door with a bagel in my hand. Like, I want this atmosphere of welcoming that, like, my mom created at our house. Like, these memories that I have from before she passed away. Like, that welcoming kitchen counter hospitality is what I want my meetups to feel like. I want you to feel like when you come over, you're cared for. Like, I will be there at the counter putting out some snacks, and, like, honestly, some days, I got a really beautiful charcuterie on a pretty board. Some days, I'm literally, like, opening a bag of chips and lay me on the counter.
Patricia Sung [00:09:19]:
But I'm gonna have some snacks. I'm gonna have some drinks. You can come and go as you please. It's casual. Sit the counter, get some work done, perch on a stool, have a chat, lean on the counter while you vent about your day. Like, I want you to feel welcome to show up, come and go as you please, and feel welcome here. This community is like self care for moms. Like, what we can actually do and fit into our day in the little cracks and crevices, like, pop in the community, ask a question, get it something answered, pop out again, show up for the meetup.
Patricia Sung [00:09:50]:
You've set aside time of the day so you feel prepared. You have a little less chaos in your day. You get to hang out with the other moms who get it. Like, I still remember we'd, oh, man. I think it was, like, June, we were doing our discussion about calendars, and I was explaining how I did it. And I think it was Judy that was, like, I feel so much better, like, seeing your, like, messy ADHD process. That, like, makes sense to me because I would never tell anybody, like, that's how my brain works. But, like, it felt so comforting to see you do that.
Patricia Sung [00:10:19]:
That was not a direct quote. I just pulled that out of my memory. FYI. Like, if you're learning about ADHD, I want you to, like, pull up a stool and be, like, unload, sit and listen, ask questions. They get a casual place. And, yes, like, when we have our monthly theme discussions, like, I prepare for this. I have a whole, like, this is the fancy charcuterie board, nourishment for your body, but, like, quick mom friendly 30 minute topic. Using that time, like, we're gonna have an exclusive discussion on the topics that you guys choose for the month.
Patricia Sung [00:10:47]:
And we learn about ADHD and how do we live with it well. But, like, it's sometimes it's chips on the counter and you just pop into Slack, answer another mom's question, or, you know, she's asking for, do you have quick easy recipes for dinner? Oh, I tried this one yesterday. It was great. Or, oh, visual timers are on Amazon Prime right now. Here's the link. And, like, you are parched. I have drinks in the counter. I will hydrate you.
Patricia Sung [00:11:10]:
I do free coaching once a month. You can volunteer. You show up that day and say, here's what I wanna change, and we figure out how to work through it. If you're not up for it that day, you can watch someone else get coached and learn so much from watching what other people are going through because we know it's not us. And also, like, glean a bunch of wisdom on, like, what we can do for ourselves. And on some weeks, we have our breakout rooms where, like, we break into small groups and chit chat. It's like standing around the counter at the party and, you know, all the moms who've been in the ADHD club for a while are here to help, and they're super kind and understanding. And, like, those moms also benefit from the newly diagnosed moms who, like, you know what? You have been bareback riding through life, and you didn't even realize that you were holding on for to your life, and you have hard one advice on what works for you and your family that you've learned even though you know you had ADHD.
Patricia Sung [00:11:57]:
And you can share what that works for you too. Like, everybody is contributing. Everybody's being supportive. And the funny part is, like, I didn't know that this would happen when I started it. Like, how much the other moms would jump in and lead and care and comfort and connect. Like, I think when I started, I was gonna have to be like all me, and I realize it's not. Like, I and I say this often, like, I don't want the community to be like the Patricia show. I want it to be a community.
Patricia Sung [00:12:21]:
But, like, because you all are such wonderful people that are listening, like, you are the people who are in the community, the kind, warm hearted, amazing humans. Like, there's so many times where the moms come back from the breakout rooms and then from, like, one group that I wasn't in and they're like, oh my gosh. I love you guys so much. Thank you so much for helping me. Like, I didn't do that. You guys did. But, like, they also are really good about, like, calling you out in, like, the super kindest way. Like, one of the moms that was new recently introduced herself, and was, like, kind of hard on herself in her introduction.
Patricia Sung [00:12:53]:
And one of the sweetest moms oh, you know, Heather, she's been on the podcast. She was in on, like, June. Heather was, like, I hope it's okay that I say this, but perhaps you're being a little hard on yourself. Like, you know, like, if you listen to the episode, you know Heather's voice, she's so soothing. She's a sleep coach. Like, she was just so kind. I was like, I didn't even have to jump in. Another mom in the most gentlest and kindest way was like, hey, you can be more kind to yourself.
Patricia Sung [00:13:19]:
You don't deserve that. You deserve to be treated well. Like, oh, yeah, this is an amazing group of moms. Like, I didn't realize that spending this time together would bring about such self acceptance that like being seen and heard and feeling like you're at home helps you know that you're not broken and helps you know that you're not messed up and there's other people like you out there. And I've just watched mom after mom accept themselves like a little more a little more love themselves a little more and like, oh, wow. I didn't know that just by spending time together, whether it's in Zoom or talking in the Slack community, like, that this would be a byproduct of like learning to accept yourself a little more. Have you ever been invited to a party and you realize, like, you weren't gonna know many people there, and so then you, like, dread it all the way going up to the event or you talk yourself out of it so you don't go? Because it's scary to put yourself out there in a situation that, like, what if I don't like them? What if they don't like me? And it feels stressful. Well, I don't want you to feel that way about hanging out in this community, mama.
Patricia Sung [00:14:23]:
So I am hosting an open house, and I want you to come and meet all the mamas so that you know what kind of people we are. PS, we're great. And that you feel comfortable joining in this community. Because if you are thinking about joining successful mama meetups or thinking about joining the retreat, I want you to know that these are your people, and what better way to do that than to actually meet the people. So come join us at our open house. We are hosting an open house in successful mama meetups on November 6th, and come meet the moms. Hang out. See what it's like.
Patricia Sung [00:15:00]:
You'll get the feel for, like, who are these people? What's the vibe? Do I wanna hang out with them? Yes. You do. It's gonna be so fun. So come hang out with us. So it's totally no charge, free 99. Come hang out at successful mama meet ups on November 6th. Our meetings are on Wednesdays. They're at 12:30 EST.
Patricia Sung [00:15:19]:
Go over to my website at patriciasung.com/openhouse. It's all one word, o p e n h o u s e, and sign up for the link so that you get the Zoom link. It's all virtual, so anybody can come anywhere in the world. See what time it is on your time zone, and come join us for the first 30 minutes. We hang out and get stuff done. So I have help there for, like, how to plan your week, or if you're just like, I just need to get some stuff done and the body doubling helps, do that. That. Like, there's no wrong way to show up and do stuff at Successful Mama Meetups.
Patricia Sung [00:15:52]:
Did you get something done? Great. That's what we're here for. Okay? So that's the first 30 minutes, and then the second 30 minutes is social time where we hang out and we make it fun. You actually want to show up to the body doubling because you get to hang out with your friends, and meet people who understand how your brain works, and you feel at home. So come join us November 6th. Sign up at patriciasung.com/openhouse, and I can't wait to see your face. And if you are listening to this after November 6th, still go over to that link and see when the next one is. I think I'm gonna do this again.
Patricia Sung [00:16:25]:
I'll see you then. Okay. On to the episode. I actually just saw this article about one of the stress responses that's frequently in women. Like, we talk about, like, you know, fight or flight or, you know, fawn and freeze. They were talking about tend and befriend, about how when women get stressed, a frequent response is to tend to, like, to go and do caretaking tasks or to befriend to go and seek out others in the community that can help, like, soothe them or give them advice or, like, to alleviate stress. Women will go tend to others and find community. I'm like, well, hello.
Patricia Sung [00:17:02]:
No wonder this works. Thank you, science. Like I didn't know that we would be healing friendship wounds by being with people who get us and love us as we are like, I didn't know it was gonna be this good. But I'm really happy that it is like because I want this to feel like home to you. I want you to feel like you can just step up to my kitchen counter anytime and feel welcome, not just by me, but all the women here. So why you to come try out the group. A business coach that I very much respect told me I need to be charging way more for this, especially that I do coaching and like give exclusive like discussions and tips on she was like, you know, she like listened to all the stuff I do. And she was like, surely this is like $200 And I'm like, no.
Patricia Sung [00:17:40]:
And she's like, that should be at least $100 I'm like, no, because I was like, it's $33 a month. And she's like, like, minimum Patricia 47. I was like, No, this is part of my community care. I want this to be accessible for many people. And like, you know what, maybe I'll change my mind in the future. But for right now, I'm really happy with that. I feel very congruent at this point about how the group is running. And, like, I'm happy with that price.
Patricia Sung [00:18:03]:
And it's funny because I this I actually met with her recently, like because, like, she told me this advice probably, like, at least a year ago. And I met with her maybe, like, a month ago for, like, follow-up. And she was like, you're still not charging more. I'm like, no. It's $33 a month. I want moms to be able to have access to this community care and not charge an arm and a leg. You know, I also have an annual plan if you wanna just sign up for the year that makes it even cheaper. But, like, I want you to try it.
Patricia Sung [00:18:28]:
I'm gonna give you a coupon code to try it for less than $33 in the show notes. So for that 1st month, you can try it out. Go look at the discount. I haven't actually decided that because I literally just decided to see it right now. So I'm gonna do that. And so go look and see whatever it is, whatever the coupon code is, whatever this kinda is, whatever amount you end up spending for that 1st month. I'm gonna bet that it's probably less than whatever you impulsively spent in your last target run. And this version of self care is going to help you a whole lot more than a face mask.
Patricia Sung [00:18:58]:
I want to give you this gift. I want you to take care of yourself, and I want you to have these other moms around who are going to care for you, but also that you then get to care for them. Like, I want you to know that like helping others isn't just about helping others. It's also healing for you. Like the beautiful silver lining byproduct. This whole idea behind tend and befriend, like, not only are you helping someone else, but it's also healing for you. And not to say that, like, we're only doing it because it helps us, but, like, there's benefit on both sides of helping others. It also helps yourself.
Patricia Sung [00:19:32]:
So having this, like, one step forward to be able to move in a direction of change from this, like, survival mode to just day to day thriving. How can you move one step closer to feeling better about your day, about yourself? And it's being with moms who get it. The beautiful part I'm like, oh, the beautiful part. I probably say that 16 times because I got 16 beautiful parts. They're all beautiful. I love them so much. You just have to bear with me my, my adjectives here. Like, one of my favorite parts is that being with other moms who get it means you feel at home.
Patricia Sung [00:20:05]:
And part of feeling at home is that, like, you don't have to say a whole bunch at the beginning. Like, you can warm up in your time. If you wanna be a wallflower for a hot second, that's totally fine. You are welcome. Like, share when you're ready. This is a safe space to practice being yourself. It's a safe space to practice taking up space. It's so good.
Patricia Sung [00:20:24]:
And if you're ready to jump right in, jump right in. But a lot of times, like, people will ask me, like, well, I don't know about being part of the group because, like, I'm an introvert or and I'm like, dude, I'm an introvert. I get it. Like, I have brought in a bunch of other people who get me. So if you get me and they get me, we probably all are, like, you know, on the same page here. Don't get me wrong. We got a lot of chatty Kathy's. And here's the thing, I'm an introvert, but you get me comfortable.
Patricia Sung [00:20:50]:
Yeah. I'm a talk your off as per this com podcast here. So, like, there is a balance of everything in this group. We have moms that talk a lot. We have moms who are very, concise in their words. We have moms who will dump all of their trauma baggage. It's second one. And some who are like, I won't tell you about that.
Patricia Sung [00:21:09]:
Thank you very much. It doesn't matter which one you are because I want you to feel comfortable either way. We also have, like, if somebody's, like, full on going deep and you're like, woah, this is too much for me. One of the things I always say at the beginning of sharing time is, like, if somebody's being too much, you just exit the room and come back to the main room and we'll put you somewhere else because you just pretend Zoom kicked you out. It's fine. Because I don't ever want you to be in a place where you're uncomfortable. This is a safe space to practice all the things in terms of being comfortable with yourself and creating a community of women that understand you, a community of moms who understand each other. So let me run down the details here.
Patricia Sung [00:21:46]:
I want you to come. We meet on Wednesdays. It's on Zoom. Check your time zone. It is 12:30 EST. I'm in central. It's 11:30 AM. You gotta go do the maths in a time zone calculator if need be.
Patricia Sung [00:21:58]:
But we spend the first 30 minutes body doubling, and we get stuff done. I always offer, like, suggested instructions on how you can prepare for the next day, few days, weeks, but you can use that time for whatever you want. If you're like, man, I still haven't called and gotten my kid that done appointment. Call them while you're there. Fill out the forms, etcetera. Use that time for what you need. And I have a little welcome video that runs through. If you're like, wait, I don't know what's going on.
Patricia Sung [00:22:20]:
You can ask me, or if you're like, I'm afraid to ask. There's also a welcome video that you can watch real quick. It's like 2 minutes and tells you what's going on. I want everyone to feel comfortable, so I give you multiple options on how to get caught up on what's going on and feel like you are comfortable in the group. Let's see. Okay. So we spend the first 30 minutes together body doubling, working on our own stuff, and then the second 30 minutes is always different. So there's usually 4, sometimes 5 weeks in a month, and we do things like once a month, we have free coaching.
Patricia Sung [00:22:48]:
This is a really great way to try out coaching. If you're curious, you can come, watch how we do it. If you wanna volunteer, volunteer, and we go through something that one of the moms in the community is dealing with. We try to keep it on theme, but, you know, we have ADHD. Sometimes we don't. But, like, for example, in August, we were talking about this whole idea of, like, preparing for things that are far ahead and bringing them into the now. So if someone coaching is next week, it's like if somebody has a topic on that, we'll do that. But if nobody is, cool.
Patricia Sung [00:23:13]:
We'll pick something else. We have different themes every month. So, you know, this summer, we talked about being able to entertain when you have ADHD and how do you create that hospitable feeling if maybe you're not comfortable having people in your house. We've talked about everything from setting up routines, sticking to the routine, parenting when you have ADHD, transitioning from, like, school to summer or summer to school. Like, the topics are always different, and they are also all voted on by you. So periodically, I ask you, like, what do you wanna talk about? And all the moms chip in their ideas, and then we take a vote. And then everyone comments, like, if there's one that stands out to them or a lot of times people are like, I agree with all of these things. So then we'll go through and figure out, like, what's gonna be coming up for the next few months.
Patricia Sung [00:23:57]:
And, like, right now, I can't even tell you what next month is because they're actually in the process of putting in their opinions and and pulling. So it's not just me telling you what's important. It's you guys saying, hey. We need help with this right now. And then diving into those things that are most relevant for you right now. So whenever we do pick our theme, one of the weeks we'll talk about that specific topic, and I'll share, like, 15, 20 minutes on what I think is helpful on that subject. And then we open up the floor, and other people will chime in their ideas. Or sometimes it'll be, okay.
Patricia Sung [00:24:26]:
Now it's time to, like, actually implement the thing we already talked about. But I want you to have, like, a tangible discussion about, like, real life and not probabilities or anything. So we've got coaching week. We've got theme week, and then the other 2 weeks are divided up into small groups. And then you get to hang out and meet some of the moms and have good conversations. And sometimes we choose the group based on, like, how old your kids are or if you wanna talk about something serious or totally silly. Sometimes we just randomly pick groups and you get who you get and you don't get upset. And I love how so often moms will come back from the small groups and be like, thank you so much.
Patricia Sung [00:25:08]:
Like, to the other moms and being like, that was so helpful. Blah blah blah. And they usually, they're like, we wanna talk more. Like, I want you leaving, wanting more, not like, they have to do that again. No. I want you to love this time that you spend getting things done and building that community meant, like, self care that self care for your heart that you need. Now keep in mind that there are some times we can't make it in person. It's okay.
Patricia Sung [00:25:34]:
Kids get sick. Things happen, and you can watch the replay. We also have a private podcast, so you can listen on the go. And there's a bonus in there that if you just need, like, some work time, there's, like, a generic hour of body doubling video, or if you're doing the audio version on the private podcast, like, it's got one with music, one without music. Like, there's a way that you can get stuff done in a way that makes sense for you. So you're gonna get a lot of stuff done. You're going to learn a lot of things, but most importantly is that community time. And if you aren't able to make in the meeting, you've got the Slack community so you can post questions and lean on the other moms for everything from, like, hey.
Patricia Sung [00:26:09]:
Does anybody have a quick dinner idea? To, oh my gosh. I don't know how to help my kid who's struggling with this. It runs the gamut. So, like, if you join today, you can post your question today, and you'll have answers from other moms today. It's like going back to my, like, party analogy. Like, you can be the teenager who pops in, grabs a snack, and runs off. If you can't stay a while, that's totally cool. I shall feed you either way.
Patricia Sung [00:26:29]:
I want you to show up, be yourself and be like, oh, wow. I'm not the only one. I want you to have this group of moms who's gonna be there to help support you and have that network, that support network with people that are your kind of people. So my friend, Ashley, always says, like, the girls who get it get it. Those are the friends I want for you. That's the kind of network I want is that the people who are here are the ones that get me. They're the ones who get you, and we all get each other. And, like, we're not all the same people, but we have that thread of commonality with ADHD.
Patricia Sung [00:26:58]:
So all is to say, I want you to join Successful Mama Meetups, not just because I want you to be here, but, like, self care matters. It's not just bubble baths and face masks and being by yourself. It's about having people who get you, having people who look out for you and are there to watch your back and that it's not just me either. Like, it's it's a whole group of moms who are willing to say, hey, you're being too hard on yourself. But in like a really nice way. Why? Because they get it. They've been there. The girls who get it, get it.
Patricia Sung [00:27:28]:
So, yes, I want you to do all the things to take care of yourself. I want you to the doctor. I want you to therapy. I want you to counseling. I want you to take a weekend away. I want you to take time for yourself. And if it's not my community, please do something. What can you do for yourself today to take care of yourself? I want you to feel seen.
Patricia Sung [00:27:45]:
I want you to feel heard. I want you to feel less alone. I want you to know it's not you, and that's exactly what this community is. And I want that for you. And if this isn't it, cool. Find something else that's gonna take care of you, but you need to be cared for. It is not a luxury item. It's like basic self care.
Patricia Sung [00:28:01]:
We have talked about this before. You need to take care of yourself. And if the only reason you're gonna do it is to say, to take care of your kids, that's fine for now. We'll make progress on that later, mama. But right now, how do you take care of you so that you can turn around and take care of your family well? So come hang out with us. Successful Mama Meetups. It's patricasung.com/meetup and come join us. Go grab the coupon code in this, show description.
Patricia Sung [00:28:24]:
Go sign up at patriciasung.com/meetup and come hang out with us because you deserve to be taken care of. I will talk to you soon, successful mama. For more resources, classes, and community, head over to my website, motherhoodinadhd.com.